A few days ago I had an interesting conversation with a guy I had chatted back and forth with. We had been messaging back and forth for awhile, so then we finally decided to have a phone conversation. The conversation covered the usual topics( name, age, interests, etc,) but he took it upon himself to ask me “Are you looking for a relationship or are you looking for love?” I hadn’t had someone pose the question in that fashion, so I told him “I’m looking for love. Well not looking, but open to the idea of letting it happen.”
It’s hard to say that I’m looking for love, because I’m not really looking. Of course I put myself in a position to meet new men and embark on a journey of friendship, connections, and perhaps provocative flirting here and there. But I can’t say that I’m on a hunt for love. I don’t think love should be something that you have to hunt for and be on the lookout with an open eye, yet rather it should be a natural progression of bonding. I suppose that bounding takes place in the form of a relationship, but according to that guy a relationship and love are two different things.
You can fall in love with someone without being in a relationship (friends do it all the time) but I understood what he was trying to say. It’s one thing to have a relationship just for the sake of it, however a relationship can simply be a status, whereas love can be a life-changing emotion, an abstract expression, and a state of euphoria. I think we’ve all as human beings have had some point in our life where we were in a relationship just because. It’s not like we were hoping to fall in love. Things went day by day. Things were said and done, but they might not have meant a great deal. Young & Foolish.
I’ve had some good relationships but I don’t think I’ve been madly in true love. But I’m young and still on a journey. Some people find their true love right off the back, and others have a lot of soul searching to do. As I grow to love myself I grow closer to the possibility of meeting someone that I’d want to give my love to. Wait…but what exactly is love? It seems like such an antiquated question, yet it’s apparently quite relevant. People around the world are still trying to fulfill this internal desire to bond with one person emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I think that even though a lot of people might enjoy dating around and having various physical partners (that’s not my thing,) they may be intrinsically searching for that one to eventually settle down with (marriage, long term commitment, etc.) This exploration of love and human connection is where The Love Project comes into the equation.
Have you heard about it? If you’re an avid Facebook user then you might have seen an advertisement on the sidebar: The Love Project Official Facebook Page At first I thought it was this charity for AIDS or some type of cause, but then I clicked on the ad and immediately fell in love with the concept. The Love Project is an online discussion/forum with videos, commentary, and advice on all things related to love. The goal is to bring everyone together in a positive environment using social media (videos, messaging, tweeting, etc) to discuss love, what love is, and an assortment of questions.
The page was first launched on December 1st and it’s already receiving quite the buzz. Relationships, dating, sex, and love are always going to be topics that people are going to discuss. It always seems to come up in conversations. Shoot, last night I was on the phone listening to someone express to me their discontent with insecure woman and the perils of trying to find a secure woman that is worthy of his love. I don’t really have issues or complaints of that nature when it comes to love. My thing is I just haven’t found that man who kisses my soul. A man who inspires me to crave him spiritually, physically, and emotionally. Just haven’t found that chemistry right now, so I’ve been single for almost a year.
I suppose I’m not on a journey to find a relationship, but I do desire love. A love that is unexpected, natural, and not forced. I can’t really sit here and say exactly what love is, but you know it when it majestically infuses into your life at the right time & place. Love isn’t a cute four letter word that little kids scribble in crayon, it should be a phantasmagorical heart pounding emotion. Now, that is a phantasmagoria of love….
The Love Project
For more thoughts on love, visit The Love Project’s website for videos on a variety of topics and answers from everyday people. You can even submit your own videos. Check it out!
©Jasmine McGee.ThinkSoul25. http://thinksoul25.com
The greatest thing about being 20 years old is the ability to admit I don’t know everything, and I’m still on a abstract exploration of life. Even though I can’t wait to be 21 and be able to finally enjoy all the great house music venues and legally order a drink, I still celebrate being young. I feel like I’m in this amazing place in life; a spot that needs to be cherished and not rushed. I’m in my last year of college and I’m so close to finally reaching that transition into working professional instead of struggling student. Everything I want to explore and see is just right around the corner.
I have a lot of things I plan on exploring and accomplishing and I’m loving the journey thus far. Even though a lot of people call me an “old soul,” it doesn’t mean I’m ready to just sit still, hunker down into a relationship, and start planning out what I will name my first kid. I mean, yes, I do have some names in mind, but I don’t plan on having any kids for a long time (another 5 years at minimum.) Throwing kids and the idea of marriage into the picture before 25 years old freaks me out! I enjoy the freedom of just casual dating, no pressure, and just being able to focus on me without crazy amounts of additional pressure.
Being young is that magical time in a human’s lifespan in which we find ourselves. It’s a moment in life where we get to have new experiences, new pains, new joys, new journeys, and even the unexpected magical encounters. I’m not saying it’s impossible to find true love when you’re young, but also young love can change like the wind. One day that person is your entire life, then the next day you graduate from college and decided to go after your dreams for a job in another city. Or perhaps, you grow apart from that person and aren’t the same when you met. There is nothing wrong with moving on; it’s expected.
That moving on and unrelenting freedom is kind of what makes the journey of mingling such a thrill. You never know what is going to happen or who you might meet, but there isn’t a great deal of pressure involved. Well, personally speaking, I just don’t put that pressure on it. I want that time to keep finding myself, going on dates with different men, and seeing where life takes me. With my continuous journey and dating (I mean I couldn’t imagine not going on dates, I love men) I do know that eventually I’ll meet a guy that will be the right one for me and I will be right for him. But I can’t just sit around and hope my dream man shows up on my doorstops; I’ve got to be realistic and have an active dating life, especially since I’m young, well-educated, and single. I always tell people not to worry about finding love and continue to journey; then when you do find a love, you might realize that you are still young, naive, and on a journey finding those in-betweens…
That last sentence I just mentioned comes from New Zealand band The Naked and Famous. They have this amazing song called “Young Blood” and it truly captures that vibe of being young and on a journey in love & life. I heard it while watching HGTV and seeing a commercial for a show I watch called Property Brothers. I first thought the song was by Passion Pit, but then I did a quick Google search and learned it was by NZ band The Naked and Famous. I’m not sure what it is about New Zealand, but they pump out a lot of cool music!
The band does have that Passion Pit vibe, but their song “Young Blood” is one that has a magical and uplifting message that truly explains young love. I been listening to this song on repeat and I think it can sum up a majority of my “love” experiences so far; it’s all a fun learning lesson that I can one day look back on and be thankful that all the paths eventually lead me to the true Mr. Right. But for now, I truly celebrate being young, single, no attachment, and anxious to zoom through my last year of college into a life filled with a career, bills, partying, traveling, and more dating!
The video is so beautiful!
©Jasmine McGee.ThinkSoul25. http://thinksoul25.com