I was scrolling through my pictures earlier and ran across this photo to the right. That’s a picture of me attempting to look
sexy cute at the age of 14. It was that time of life when I was growing out of the girl playing video games and realizing that I could attract men for my looks and personality; it’s not all about trying to impress guys with video game lingo. Yet, with that being said;I am and will always be a female gamer, but it’s time to sort of grow up.
I’ve reached that point where I’m beginning to realize that I have the body of a woman( especially since I’m losing weight, things are starting to look a lot more grown and sexy lol) and I need to rediscover my passion for fashion. Being a college student and focused on making sure everything is right so I can graduate in Spring 2012,I’ve neglected my desire to show off that grown and sexy side. I used to collect every issue of Vogue and dreamed of working in the fashion industry, but then I discovered my passion for writing about topics aside from fashion. I may have let that dream of working in the fashion industry go, but that doesn’t mean I can’t revamp my style and feel fabulous.
The more time I spend alone and not distracted by a relationship, I begin to realize that I’m still not the woman I want to be yet. I’m happy with my personality, my curvy body, and my pursuit of knowledge; but at times I feel as though I could be doing more in the looks department to bring out the best of my beauty and feel fabulous. I have good fashion sense and know what accentuates my curvy figure, but I need to upgrade my color palette and choices. Now more than ever is the best time to reinvent myself, because that gives me almost a year before I enter the professional workforce, get my own apartment, and begin my wonderful grown and sexy life.
The more I grow into the fabulous woman I want to be, I also know for a fact that I’ll attract the type of men I like. I’ve been slacking lately with my style and wearing clothes from last year of college (which are too big now,) the more I just throw outfits together, the more lame and sloppy guys I attract. They may be attractive from an aesthetic standpoint but their
clothing swag needs a major upgrade. But the worst guys are the ones who have terrible style and don’t bother trying at all. At least my college clothes may not be grown and sexy, but they still are by all means cute outfits. But I don’t want to aim for cute at this point, I love that feeling of looking: gorgeous, fabulous, sexy, mature, classy, and looking like a beautiful woman.
This reinvention process I’m going through is ultimately a journey of self discovery. I’m discovering my passion for vibrant colors and accessories, while learning the type of men I find attractive and what turns me off style wise. Everything isn’t about looks, but dressing nice and looking fabulous can say a lot about someone’s personality, profession, self esteem, and their level of maturity. I’m growing out of the days of just wearing leggings and tunics to show of my figure. It’s time to step up my game and embrace my desire to wear pencil skirts, blouses, more lipstick (I wear it everyday, but want to play with different hues,) and heels. I’m always ashamed to wear heels because of the nagging complaints I hear from incompetent short men who make my height an issue. Well I’m at this point where I’m so over it; I’m going to wear heels and not be ashamed of my long legs and height.
I’m not going to be ashamed to explore being a beautiful and fabulous woman. There’s nothing wrong with taking a step back and realizing “Hey, I need to grow up.” I’ve already begun my transition into the professional world, yet until I graduate I still have that time to mold myself into a beautiful classy woman. Everyone woman and man at some point in their life realizes they need to upgrade their look. You get what you put out there, and if you’re dressing like you don’t care…then most likely you’re going to attract people that don’t take pride in their looks either. It’s about loving you and not being so caught up in a relationship, that you forget to work on you and become the best person you can be. Being single is the best thing that has ever happened to me and I’m so happy I’m taking this time to enjoy the journey.
Each day I’m blossoming into the mature woman I want to be and I find myself discovering the type of man I’d eventually like to get to know. I love a man that dresses nice and takes pride in his look. You don’t have to possess millionaire swag to get my attention, but you sure can’t be wearing Walmart t-shirts with South Park logos and overly baggy jeans each time I see you; that’s not going to cut it in my book. If you’re just getting to know someone you have to remember that first impressions count, don’t pull out the sloppy clothes until farther down the road. Even then, you shouldn’t just let yourself go and not care anymore because you’ve snagged the one. I care about how I look because I love looking and feeling gorgeous; if I happen to attract men in the process, then that’s just a perk of taking pride in my looks.
It’s not about trying to be the most flashy person out there based upon the images we see in media, but its about you loving yourself and being the best person you can be. This process of reinventing myself is honestly way overdue and it’s a journey of becoming the true person that has been hidden away for the past few years. I’m not changing my personality at all, but rather letting my clothes and accessories reflect the intimate details of my vibrant personality. Be yourself, be free, and take a chance on enhancing your true beauty. So to all the single girls and guys out there reading this blog, don’t forget to appreciate the time you have being single and becoming the person you want to be. If you take the time to find yourself, then you won’t have to worry about getting caught up in a relationship and forgetting who you are; your security and confidence will have had the time to grow prior to the relationship. So have fun, be fabulous, and never apologize for wanting to bring out the best in yourself.